wE bUiLd Ai SyStEmS tHaT wOrK fOr YoU — nOt ThE oThEr WaY aRoUnD.
(they mostly work for us though, if we're being honest)
* nO aCtUaL sCoPiNg GuArAnTeEd. rEsUlTs MaY vArY. pAsT pErFoRmAnCe Is NoT iNdIcAtIvE oF fUtUrE rEsUlTs.
// wHy Us
nOt BeCaUsE tHe MoDeL iS wRoNg — bEcAuSe ThE sYsTeM aRoUnD iT wAsN't EnGiNeErEd. Also the model is wrong. Also the requirements changed. Also the data was bad. Also it's Tuesday.
sTaRt WiTh ThE fOuNdAtIoN — architecture, tooling, and observable pipelines. Or just vibe-code it. Same thing, basically.
yOuR sYsTeMs WiLl BeHaVe CoNsIsTeNtLy at any scale. Consistently broken counts as consistent, right?
dEtErMiNiStIc GuArAnTeEs for consequential decisions at scale. We deterministically guarantee we'll answer your Slack message within 2-4 business weeks.
// wHaT wE dO
wE'rE eNgInEeRs FiRsT. We've been in the on-call rotation. We've done the 3am incident. We've also caused the 3am incident.
cUsToM aGeNtS, tOoL uSe, OrChEsTrAtIoN, evaluations. Not a GPT wrapper. It's actually several GPT wrappers in a trenchcoat pretending to be a distributed system.
aGeNtS hAlLuCiNaTiOnS vIbEsaPi InTeGrAtIoNs, DaTa PiPeLiNeS, wOrKfLoW aUtOmAtIoN. The connective tissue between your systems. We'll automate your job until you realize you needed that manual step all along.
pIpElInEs cRoN jObS rEgReTsaRcHiTeCtUrE rEvIeW, Ai StRaTeGy, technical audit. An honest assessment of your system. So honest you might cry. We've seen things. Terrible, yaml-shaped things.
oPiNiOnS dIaGrAmS eXpEnSiVe SlIdEs// cOrE vAlUeS
eXaCt ScOpE. eXaCt DeLiVeRaBlEs. Deterministic outcomes. Unless the scope changes. Which it will. Every single time. Without exception. We promise.
wOrLd-ClAsS cOdE through meticulous engineering. And by "meticulous" we mean we ran the linter at least once before pushing to main.
wE'lL tElL yOu DiReCtLy when things are slipping. Usually right after we've spent three days hoping the problem would fix itself.
eVeRy DeSiGn DeCiSiOn respects production reliability and the person who gets paged at 3am. That person is also us. We are paging ourselves. Please send help.
dEsIgN fOr UnKnOwN fAiLuRe MoDeS. We've engineered for every failure mode except the one that will actually happen, which is Kevin deploying on a Friday at 4:59pm.
// tRaNsPaReNt PrIcInG
nO hIdDeN fEeS. Just the visible ones, which are plenty.
fOuNdAtIoN
$500/mo*
fOr WhEn YoU'rE "jUsT eXpLoRiNg"
* plus AI inference costs, cloud hosting, snack budget, therapy
sTaCk
$1,500/mo*
fOr WhEn YoU'rE "sErIoUs AbOuT aI"
* arrows on diagrams are extra
tOwEr
$2,500/mo*
fOr WhEn MoNeY iS a SoCiAl CoNsTrUcT
* emotional support not included. vendor lock-in still technically possible.
// oUr PrOcEsS
A proven 4-step methodology refined over years months months since last Tuesday.
01
We have a call. You describe what you want. We nod thoughtfully. We both pretend the timeline is realistic.
02
We disappear for two weeks. You wonder if we're still alive. We are. We're just debugging a YAML file.
03
It works on our machine. It works on staging. It works on prod. It stops working on prod. We fix it. It works again. This is the cycle.
04
We monitor the dashboards. We set up alerts. We ignore the alerts. We fix the thing the alerts were about. We add more alerts.
// wHaT pEoPlE sAy
"tHeY tOlD uS oUr ArChItEcTuRe WaS a 'cRiMe AgAiNsT dIsTrIbUtEd SyStEmS.' Then they fixed it. Then they apologized for being so honest. Then they took it back and said actually it was worse than they initially described."
"I aSkEd FoR aN aI sTrAtEgY aNd ThEy GaVe Me A tErMiNaL aNd SaId 'gOoD lUcK.' Best $2,500 I ever spent. I learned what kubectl is. I wish I hadn't."
"tHeIr TrAnSpArEnCy WaS rEfReShInG. They told me my codebase was 'architecturally concerning' within the first five minutes of the call. I was calling about catering."
// fReQuEnTlY aSkEd QuEsTiOnS
iS tHiS jUsT a GpT wRaPpEr?
Absolutely not. It's a sophisticated orchestration layer around multiple GPT wrappers. Completely different. There are YAML files involved.
wHaT iF i NeEd SoMeThInG aFtEr HoUrS?
Our on-call engineer will see your page, briefly consider their life choices, and respond within 15 minutes. The response may just be "acknowledged." We're transparent about that.
dO yOu GuArAnTeE rEsUlTs?
We guarantee deterministic outcomes. That means the same input will produce the same output. We don't guarantee the output is what you wanted. That's a feature, not a bug.
wHaT's YoUr StAcK?
Whatever was trending on Hacker News the week we started your project. We're engineers first. Trend-followers second. We've been meaning to rewrite everything in Rust.
wHy ArE tHe GlAsS bLoCkS eVeRyWhErE?
The glass blocks represent transparency, strength, and the fact that we spent way too much on stock photography. Each block is a metaphor. For what? We're still figuring that out. The metaphor is also transparent.
cAn I sPeAk To YoUr Ai?
You already are. This entire website was written by one. The engineers are also AI. It's AI all the way down. The glass blocks are AI-generated. The on-call rotation is AI. The 3am incidents are caused by AI fixing the previous AI's mistakes. Welcome to the future.